Have you ever noticed how dumb our brains are sometimes? Especially female ones (I could be wrong - maybe guys have this issue too. But it definitely seems to be more of a problem for girls).
How is it, that 98% of your time with someone can be really great and happy, but it's that other 2% that you remember. The one thing they said in that one conversation that just rubbed you the wrong way and still bugs you, or the one time they forgot to come get you for lunch. Why does that stuff overshadow the overwhelming majority of the time when things are good? Is that just human nature? Can you change that? Does giving less weight to the negative 2% have to mean ignoring it altogether? How do you give it the attention it needs but not let it become too important?
Thoughts?
Stuff I found while looking around
4 hours ago
2 comments:
I'm pretty sure most guys don't have that issue, but I do think it something that most girls struggle with. I don't know if you can outright change it, and you definitely don't have to ignore a hurt, but there's definitely something in telling the person how you feel, (There's nothing wrong with saying "hey- that hurt, but it's cool.") and then just letting it go- realizing that it was probably a mistake, and moving on. If you keep hanging on to those things, then everytime something bad happens with that person, you'll remember the other hurt, not matter how small- and the new hurt will seem all the worse. Everybody messes up- and everybody lets us down at some point or another. A lot of life is dealing with little things like that, the bigger they become the more your life just goes from crisis to crisis, and then you start looking for those things instead of dealing with them at the time, and then putting them aside. And yeah, sometimes it does mean ignoring them. You'll always have memories of stuff that happens, sometimes even after you've dealt with it it'll come back to mind and you just have to say "Nope. That's done."
I think it's probably worse for you, because one of your (many :) great qualities is what a loyal and thoughtful friend you are. You seem to really value loyalty in yourself, and in your friends- which makes even the smallest hurts seem even worse.
Anyway- those are some of my thoughts...but this comment is getting way to long, so I'll shut up now. :) It's not really a solution, but I hope it helps. Thanks for the update. I miss you! :)k
Look Jen!!! How many times do I have to say I'm sorry, goodness...
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